26.2.11

phantoms

ghosts of songs lurk in corners of my mind. they pounce on me when i least expect them, waiting for that moment, ah, that precise point in time when i'm looking away. they descend upon my mind like a lattice around all my thoughts, they envelop everything. they haunt me sometimes, a woman's voice humming exactly one note, while the rest of the song watches elusively from too far away, while i grope in the dark for just one more snatch of the song, a clue so i can figure out what ever comes next.

they delight in teasing me, these phantoms that i can only ever hope to place, sometimes heaping nostalgia onto me. phantoms from the past, some that bring me specific memories of specific people in specific places, others that leave me with vague feelings, feelings of being at home, of friendships i've lost, and so the songs have either lost their meaning or bring me only pain.

and so, i sing, hoping that i can reach it, this song, sometimes just hoping that eventually, i'll know the rest of it, and when i do listen to it, it will live up to everything i went through to find it again.

**

(look ma, two posts!)
(there's actually a third. didn't want to overdose. tomorrow, may be.)

4 comments:

aminura ytrobarkahc said...

"...while the rest of the song watches elusively from too far away, while i grope in the dark for just one more snatch of the song.."
Beautiful line, madam! Ah! such a wonderous personification-a song as a man/woman who takes pleasure in being aloof and enigmatic. Its such a pleasure to discover that one of my close friends is turning into such an accomplished wordsmith...may i be your hanger-on when you are famous?

Sita said...

too much flattery, as always. in all likelihood, i'll be your hanger-on, famous nima. =D

Krishna said...

Love it. :)

Sita said...

thenks, cheeks. :)