i need an excuse to wear lipstick.

any excuse, really. i brush my lips before i do - gotta get rid of the dry skin, put on chapstick, wait three minutes, then put on lipstick. i pout at myself in the mirror, then blot it out. by the time i get to the party, the lipstick is a ghost. it only exists in my mind - and on the corner of the glass. by the end of the night, i forget i was wearing any to begin with.

eye make-up is another issue. i wear kajal everyday. i look too sleepy without. i don't know how to mascara. the few times i've used it, i've felt super pretty. (make-up is too often in the feeling, don't you think?) i have three boxes with colour for my eyes, but i don't know how to put it on. i've watched too many youtube videos, but i haven't practiced enough.

my mother used more make-up at 27 than i possibly ever will. she used to have these two huge boxes full of lipsticks, eye shadows, mascara, blush, brushes, foundation, two compacts in her handbag at all times, a concealer. she used to wear lipstick and matching bangles to office everyday. she doesn't anymore - i really don't know why.

so why is it such a big deal for me?


Prabha Mohan said...

Because you are pretty. That's a real barrier to sincerely wearing or learning to wear make-up, unless your vocation demands that you do, or you have a real passion for it and liken it to art.

Sita said...

there's got to be a middle ground, though, right? what if i'm not passionate about it, but just like the colour it adds to my face?